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Some quotes about technology and software I collected from the web and other sources.

  • If it's not on fire then it's a software problem
  • Any sufficient advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. -- Arthur C. Clarke
  • Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong. -- Murphy's Laws
  • To err is human, but it takes a computer to really screw things up
  • If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed to be replaced anyway
  • The person who smiles when bad things happen knows who to blame it on
  • When all else fails, read the instructions
  • A computer program does what you tell it to do, not what you want it to do
  • If wires can be connected in two different ways, the first way blows the fuse
  • Do not look into the laser with remaining eye! -- warning message on the side of lab laser
  • Who's General Failure & why's he reading my disk?
  • Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.
  • Fast. Powerful. User-friendly. Now choose any two -- Eric Daniels
  • Sometimes just a few hours of trial and error debugging can save minutes of reading manuals
  • He who laughs last probably made a back up
  • Hardware is the part of a computer that can be kicked, if all you can do is swear at it, then it must be software
  • Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live
  • Smith & Wesson... the original Point-N-Click interface -- Neil Mohammed
  • Computers don't make mistakes... What they do they do on purpose! -- King of the Hill
  • There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX. We don't believe this to be a coincidence -- Jeremy S. Anderson
  • If brute force doesn't solve your problem, you're just not using enough
  • The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not "Eureka!" but "That's funny..." -- Isaac Asimov
  • Just because you CAN do something doesn't mean you SHOULD
  • Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself
  • If for some reason Murphy's Law fails to operate, it is building up for something big.

Contact

mail: chris_at_die-schneider.net

Twitter: @schneider_chris

Github: cschneider

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